Saturday, May 9, 2009



1: producing no useful result: futile
2: being at leisure : idle
3: lacking use or effect: functionless

Defending myself against the accusation that my nature is otiose would take too much energy so I'll just go with it.

There is a comedian I like named Mike Birbiglia. I first heard him on NPR and instantly developed an unrequited crush on him, like I tend to do with anyone who is funny, sarcastic, self effacing, self deprecating, lazy and successful. I like people who fail and fail and fail and reach rock bottom and start sinking and are left for dead and suddenly revive themselves and become FAMOUS and RENOWNED. Am I revealing too much about my personality right now?

I especially enjoyed a quote of his regarding a medical sleep condition he has where, because of a dopamine deficiency he actually acted out the things he dreamt about in real life. After a few near death experiences he was told that he MUST go to a doctor for this disorder ASAP or he could seriously injure or even kill himself. To this he said something along the lines of,

"I should have gone to the doctor. And I thought yeah, I could go to the doctor, or I could just eat dinner. Cause that seems much easier. And I just went with dinner for years."

I love this because it mirrors my personality to a tee. Someone will tell me that if I get out of bed, spin in circled forty-two times, eat a sandwich and then go to my nearest post office and talk to a man named Phil, I will get 1,000 dollars. And I will think about it for a moment and decide it sounds too complicated and time consuming and decide to eat dinner instead. You could tell me I will be dead by Tuesday if I don't go to the dentist tonight and I'll think, I hate the dentist and I love dinner, so I think I'll have dinner instead.

Yes this unfortunate personality trait is otiose; it's irresponsible and will probably lead to my demise. However, according to the people I admire, it is my hope that eventually after never trying, and actively producing no useful results I will pick myself out of the gutter, wet and gleaming and join my fellow slackers at the top, famous, renowned and filthy rich.

A inspiration to those talented individuals around me who would save the world, if they could only get out of bed.

*For more information on my future fake husband visit
* I cheated again and did not use a Goggle image, but rules are made to be broken.


MEBEE said...

i know you hate this but it's Birbiglia. because when you're rich and renowned for being otiose yourself, you probably won't want people spelling your name Birkowski. but you might like Bukowski.

Eugenia Borkowski said...

HaHa. I don't hate it actually, I appreciate it. The whole purpose of this is to make me a better speller, writer etc. So...appreciated boday, as always.